Teach Him to Understand the Heart of a Woman

In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat her with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. If you don’t treat her as you should, your prayers will not be heard.
1 Peter 3:7

God entrusts our beloved sons to us for only a certain number of days. What a great opportunity to invest in their futures by preparing them to love and understand the heart of their future wife! I believe when a man walks down the aisle and says “I do,” it is his every hope and intention that his marriage is for “life.” I’m sure his sincere desire is to understand and take care of the beauty he has chosen as his wife. He longs to be her hero and lead her safely through life. Yet many times a husband discovers he does not know how to accomplish his God-appointed mission in marriage. Eventually, his attempts at love, leadership, and even heroism miss their mark as his beauty withdraws emotionally from the very one she hoped would rescue her. Sadly, his wife eventually closes up her spirit in order to protect her heart from hurt. Intimacy, happiness, and hope wither into isolation, pain, and despair. Feeling helpless and frustrated, the man she longs for gives up trying. The result can be empty marriage, adultery, or divorce. What began as a love story all too often ends in tragedy. A loving mother help teach her son about the tender heart of a woman. Who better to show him how to truly appreciate the way a woman is wired by God Himself than his mother?

Teach Him to Become a Hero

I have fought a good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful.
And now the prize awaits me—the crown of righteousness that the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on that great day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his glorious return.
2Timothy 4:7

The fact is, our boys were created to fight battles. Whether the attacker is a physical or spiritual entity, boys are hardwired by divine design with the ability to protect their wives, their families and their country. Look at all the mighty men in the word of God who fought great battles and rescued or changed nations! King David was just a boy when he stepped onto his first battlefield—but he recognized a battle worth fighting for. His faith in God made him a true hero. Can you imagine how King David’s life might have turned out if his mother had run onto the battlefield and begged the giant not to hurt her baby? Or if she had taken matters into her own hands and attacked the enemy herself? David would never have had the chance to experience Lord’s strength in him. And he probably would not have completed his mighty work here on earth, either (not to mention the humiliation he would have endured as a result of his mother’s intervention!). Encourage your son’s God-given desire for heroism and adventure! Boys need to be esteemed for their courage and strength. Our goal as mothers should be to teach and inspire them to fight for the things in life worth fighting for, and to help them find their courage and strength in the Lord. don’t wait for the world to change its moral fiber; with God’s help, you can raise a modern-day hero who will fight for his family and remain a faithful, loving husband and father.

Teach Him to Express Love

How sweet is your love, my treasure, my bride! How much better it is than wine! Your perfume is more fragrant than the richest of spices. Your lips, my bride, are as sweet as honey.
Song of Solomon 4:10–11

Unfortunately, few Christian marriages experience love the way God intended How much better would your marriage be if your husband had been taught as a boy to express the kind of love that reaches deep into your heart? You are more than a mother You are more than simply the mother in your son’s life; you are also the representation of a woman’s need to be loved. And the way you express love to him and teach him how to express love to you will greatly impact the way her loves his future wife and children. The truth is, a Christian marriage should be the world’s definitive expression of love! God even uses the marriage relationship as an illustration of His love for us, His bride.

Teach Him to Resolve Conflict

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Romans 12:18

I have observed many marriages since I have been in the ministry, and the common sentiment I see in men is this: Tell me how to fix this and I will. I think a lot of men would fight for their marriages if only someone had taught them how. Think about what makes your heart melt when you watch a great love story. It’s not the hero’s physical strength or his beloved’s beauty, is it? No, you and I are drawn to the power of true love and its inexplicable ability to prevail over tragedy and adversity. The greater the conflict, the stronger the love must be in order to reach resolve. When the hero does whatever it takes to save the relationship, our hearts soar with renewed hope. That is just the kind of love we want to instill in our boys. We should be teaching them to fight for their marriages, not make excuses, blame others and throw in the towel when conflict comes. Our goal as mothers should be to grow them into Men who know how to fight for their families, not against them!

Teach Him to Be a Man of His Word

Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.
Matthew 5:37, niv

We live in an era where too many potentially great men have lost sight of the power of a promise Our boys are being trained to say whatever they need to in order to get what they want—in other words, to lie without conscience or consequence. Too many modern-day politicians, celebrities, and yes, even fathers have led our sons to believe that broken promises are acceptable so long as the end result makes them happy. Our heavenly Father warns us that when we do not keep our word, evil things happen. If that sounds a little dramatic on our Creator’s part, just take a look at the damage wreaked by the broken families strewn across this continent, in many cases because men have not been taught to keep their word. We can teach our beloved boys to discern truth from lies and to keep their promises. We can help establish a new generation of men by training our boys to become men of their word.

Teach Him the Power of Purity

The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy.
My purpose is to give life in all its fullness.
John 10:10

Every day we hear about great men who sacrificed their families, their witness, their character, and everything they worked to achieve for a few fleeting moments’ pleasure. God warns in His Word that there is an enemy after us, and he is out to kill, steal, and destroy us and our boys and all Christians. If we are not careful, we will aid him in his mission. This is too often accomplished through what we allow them to read, watch, and listen for the sake of entertainment the devil uses many venues to destroy boys’ minds, morals, and manhood. The more mindless entertainment they take in, the less capable they are of distinguishing right from wrong and good from evil. If we really want victory for our beloved boys, our lives will have to be louder than the world’s influence

Our homes need to be places of refuge where our sons can find peace for their young minds, protection for their hearts, and training to prepare them for the mental and physical battles the will have to fight every time they exit our homes. It is a mother’s privilege and responsibility to train her son, while he is under her influence, we can grow our boys into a godly husband who knows how to fight the battles of the mind.

Teach Him to Provide for His Family

If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family,
he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
1 Timothy 5:8, niv

Men are called by God Himself to provide for their households. However, our men and boys are becoming less and less motivated to provide for their family because they have watched the social trend of woman learning to do it all.

Today’s modern woman is smart, self-sufficient, and successful apart from a man. In many cases, wives make more money than their husbands. Today, more women lead corporate America than ever before. When it comes to the male/female roles in the workplace, it is a far cry from the way God designed things in the beginning. Our sons will be trained to provide for their household someday only if they are taught that providing is the manly thing to do and God’s recipe for a healthy marriage. Helping our son’s understand their position as provider will be a great blessing to them, as well as the future success of their career and marriage.

Teach Him to Have a Real Relationship with God

Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul
and with all your strength.
Deuteronomy 6:5, niv

Teach Him to Become a Godly Leader

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless

Ephesians 5:25–27, nlt

How desperately our world needs our beloved boys to become strong and mighty men of faith. There is nothing more powerful or comforting in this unstable world than seeing a real man with real faith and a real relationship with God. Men of faith know their God up close and personal. These mighty men of God have the power inside them to win wars, save nations, set captives free, kill giants in the land, and defeat the devil in every way. This kind of man lives for God and not for self. He makes our world a safer and better place. The only difference between the mighty men we read about in the Bible and our sons is that those men knew God in a very personal, very real way. There is a big difference between teaching kids about God and connecting them to Him. If our sons are going to become great husbands and mighty warriors for their King, they need to see God in action. They need to witness His power in their prayers, understand their place in His eternal plan, and most important, know Him as their Father in heaven.

According to the Word, a man’s roles as spiritual leader are to be representative of Christ at home, and to present his wife to God as a radiant Christian woman. However, many women have out of necessity become stronger spiritual influences in their homes than their husbands. When a man has learned to lead by love and a godly example, sacrificing his own wants and desires for the well-being and protection of his family, he is a true man of God. The truth is, woman desire for their husbands to be the captain of the ship, the protector when life’s storms hit. We can prepare our sons to assume their God-appointed position in their own homes someday by clearing up the confusion and teaching our sons the correct male /female roles in a home, as established from the beginning by God Himself. We should not be teaching our sons to depend solely on us. Instead, our goal should be to help them learn to be loving leaders while they are at home.

Teach Him to Look for a Good Wife

A worthy wife is her husband’s joy and crown; a shameful wife saps his strength.
Proverbs 12:4, nlt

Can you imagine spending years preparing your beloved boy to become a godly husband, only to see him end up marrying the wrong woman because he was never taught how to look for a good wife? If you look deep into the Word of God you will discover a wealth of wisdom from the Creator of marriage—God the Father. There are some major differences between how marriage was originally meant to be and what it has become. One of the differences from the beginning is that God used parents to help find good wives for their sons. This is not an area of your son’s life that you should let him learn the hard way. Aside from his decision to follow God, the most important choice your prince will make is which young lady will take that long walk down the aisle and join him at the wedding altar. Who will his princess be? Use your God-given influence to help him choose a good wife so he can have the good life and walk in favor with God, as promised in Proverbs 18:22.